The Relationship Anomoly
by LadyPyre
Summary: Penny has the birthday blues as she ponders her life and her unrequited feelings for a certain genius. Rating for language


Penny was sitting at the bar she usually reserved for feeling sorry for herself. The drinks were cheap and the clientele even cheaper, but she came here to get drunk and be left alone. The place wasn't a dive, but it wasn't one of the classy establishments she usually frequented and it was quite popular with the college crowd. Today was her thirtieth birthday.

Everyone had forgotten and she hadn't made a real effort to remind anyone. She wished she could also forget.

Thirty was the age one should have all one's shit together and yet here she was sitting, feeling like a complete failure.

She was still a waitress at The Cheesecake Factory, although she was studying part-time. She wanted a management and business degree, but as she still had to pay the bills and her new student loan, she had to work while studying so the degree was taking double the time it usually should. After two years, she wasn't even half way through yet.

Financially she was going backwards, but a lucky break on a commercial had saved her temporarily. So she hadn't completely given up on her acting aspirations yet, so sue her. She was hoping that big break was just around the corner to save her from the humdrum her life had become, but auditions were thin on the ground and the tiny hope that had always been bright was dimming more and more each day.

Her love life was a complete joke. She hadn't been laid in nearly a year as her usual meat-headed type no longer interested her. It was most probably because she was already in love with someone, someone who couldn't possibly reciprocate her feelings...ever.

Amy had broken up with Sheldon a couple of months ago and had begun dating Stuart again. The lack of affection she was getting from Sheldon had finally gotten to her and one day she just said she couldn't take it anymore.

Sheldon hadn't even been upset; Penny would go as far to say he looked completely content. Amy was still part of the group and Sheldon still took advantage of their intellectual friendship, he just didn't have to bother avoiding Amy's sexual advances anymore and that suited him perfectly.

He was making great leaps in his work and the scientists at CERN were taking notice. Sheldon was sure it was only a matter of time before the Nobel Prize was his.

Actually, everyone in the group was successful and satisfied in the direction their life was taking. They all had girlfriends/boyfriends and their careers were at a prime. It was only Penny that was the degenerate in the group.

She was always the outsider—the different one.

Sure, they had almost instantly integrated her into their group and made her feel welcome but lately she'd been suffering. She had to see him nearly every day and it was becoming a daily torture. Constantly staring at the one thing you could never have was soul destroying.

She really wished things could be different.

She sighed and took a tiny sip from her glass. She had come here to get drunk but she couldn't seem to get into the spirit of it. After two hours of just sitting here, she was still on her first drink. She forced herself to take a bigger gulp.

Just as she put her glass down with a sigh, a shadow fell over her and a guy completely got into her space. Penny looked up into his face and leaned away from his greasy smile.

'Hi, Baby, it looks like you need some company.' Penny knew he was one of those college students and he was very good looking in an obvious kind of way, but his manner just creeped her out. Penny was ashamed to think that a few years ago she would have taken him up on his offer, now he just made her skin crawl.

'No thanks, I'm fine.' Penny said kindly yet firmly.

He trailed the back of his fingers down her bare arm and said, 'Pretty girl like you shouldn't drink alone.'

Penny flinched away and shuddered in disgust, 'I don't mean to be rude but I'm really not interested. I just want to be left alone.'

He gave her a vicious sneer and snidely said, 'To think I almost lowered my standards for an old piece of ass.'

Penny rolled her eyes, but inwardly the barb had hit. She was thankful when he stomped off in a huff.

'Nice,' Penny muttered and took another sip and rubbed tiredly at her eyes, she really hadn't needed that sort of hit to her self-esteem right then.

She had just reached down to take her purse to leave when another shadow fell over her.

'For God's sake, will you leave me alone?' Penny snapped irritably and looked up to give the douche bag another piece of her mind, only to see Sheldon Cooper flinch away from her.

'Oh jeez, sorry, Sweetie,' Penny apologised, gently laying her hand on his forearm to settle him, 'I thought you were someone else.'

Sheldon looked at her with those amazing blue eyes and settled on the barstool next to hers, 'Hello, Penny.'

Penny gave him a small smile, unconsciously leaning closer, 'What you doing here, Sheldon? You hate bars.'

'I do,' he nodded seriously, 'yet I've spent nearly a fortune's worth of entrance fees looking for you. Then I remembered you sometimes frequent this one.'

'You were looking for me?' Penny asked amazed. 'And you braved how many bars doing it?'

'Indeed.'

'Why?'

'It is your birthday, is it not?' Sheldon was staring at her as if she were a tiny bit crazy.

'I thought you had forgotten.'

'Penny,' he said with his trademark condescending look, 'this mind does not forget anything.'

Penny smiled a little and patted his arm, gratified when he didn't flinch away.

'I had come over earlier with your gift and had not found you in your apartment. As you didn't have any plans with your friends I had assumed you would be there. Why weren't you there, Penny? You completely disrupted my scheduled plan.'

Penny shrugged but thought his intentions were very sweet, 'I had thought everyone had forgotten so I came here to celebrate,' she explained.

'You came here?' Sheldon looked around in confusion. 'Not to your usual standards, Penny.'

Penny looked down at her hands in her lap and shrugged again. 'I wasn't in the mood for my usual standards.'

Sheldon twitched a bit and was obviously gearing up to say something, 'Would you like... would you like to discuss it?'

Penny shook her head, 'Not now, maybe another time.'

He let out an ill-concealed breath of relief and Penny laughed, 'Why would you ask if you don't want to listen?'

Sheldon sat up straighter, 'I have been informed that listening to a friend's problems is a non-optional social convention.'

Penny smiled, 'I see.'

Sheldon opened his mouth again to say something Penny was sure was lecturing, when a voice to their right angrily said, 'I thought you wanted to be alone, slut. Fuck off, nerd, she has better offers.'

Sheldon stood up and to Penny's amazement, got into the guys face, 'Apologise! Penny is not a slut!'

Next thing Penny knew, Sheldon was on the floor, his hand covering his mouth.

The big asshole had just punched Sheldon!

Penny stood up quickly and it was second nature to extend her leg and kick the Neanderthal in the nuts. He doubled over in pain and fell over sideways. The noisy, high pitched sobbing would have amused Penny any other day but she was too busy kneeling by Sheldon's side worriedly.

She gently pulled his hand away from his mouth and a light coating of blood covered his fingers, 'Good Lord, I'm bleeding,' he said in a panic.

Penny gently traced Sheldon's bottom lip where the small cut graced the corner. The bleeding had already stopped and she took his upper arm to help him to his feet.

'It's just a little blood. You're fine, I promise.' Penny stroked his bare forearm soothingly and Sheldon looked at her, a little dazed.

'You kicked another guy in the balls for me.'

Penny began leading him out of the pub, her bag firmly over her shoulder and her car keys clutched in the hand she wasn't using to keep Sheldon steady.

'Of course, Moonpie, I'll always be there to kick some guy in the balls for you. Besides, you stuck up for me. No one's ever done that for me. Thank you.'

'Only Meemaw can call me Moonpie, Penny.'

Penny only smiled, helping him into the front seat of her car, 'When we get home, I'll tend to your lip, Sweetie.'

Penny pulled out of the parking lot and they were silent for a while before, 'Thank you, Penny.' He had spoken softly into the silence of the car.

She patted him on the thigh and felt him shiver.

Ten minutes later they pulled into Los Robles and began the journey up the flights of stairs in silence. Penny opened the door to 4B and settled Sheldon on the couch before quickly going to her bathroom to get the disinfectant and a cotton swab.

Penny came back into the room and Sheldon turned his body so it was sideways on the couch facing her. She had to rest on her knees in order to get to the right height to treat him.

She lightly dabbed at his cut and he flinched away. 'I know it stings, Honey, but just stay still, okay?'

He was staring at her with those blue, blue eyes again and her trail of thought disintegrated, 'Sing me Soft Kitty,' he murmured, not breaking eye contact.

She nodded and began to sing, dabbing his cut again and gratified when he didn't move away this time. Her eyes kept flitting from his wound to his eyes and back again—his never moved away once. Once the song finished, she leaned forward and kissed his cut better. She felt him freeze and she leaned back, mortified.

His eyes were wide as they stared at her. 'Why did you do that?'

Penny blushed and furiously tried to think of a way to save the situation but kept coming up blank, 'I just kissed it better,' she muttered in embarrassment.

He wouldn't stop looking at her and she couldn't even muster up the courage to look him in the face, her head snapped up though when he said, 'Well it is still sore, so you did not do such a good job.'

Penny looked at him considering and slowly leaned toward him making sure exactly what her intentions were, he didn't move or say anything, and gently pressed her lips to his.

She kept her lips against his for a couple of seconds and when she meant to pull away, she felt his hand gently grip her wrist and his lips began to subtly move against hers.

Penny couldn't understand why this was happening but she wasn't in the mood to question it right now. Her other hand moved into his short hair and she gently suckled his bottom lip until he opened slightly. Penny wasn't sure how far to push, but she had already come this far. She traced the seam of his lips with the tip of her tongue and was dismayed when he pulled away.

He cleared his throat but didn't let go of her wrist. His face went red and Penny could tell he was gearing up to say something. He suspicions were confirmed when he said, 'I really need to speak with you about something, Penny.' Penny had to smile, she knew him so well.

'Sure, Sweetie, anything,' she assured him earnestly.

'When I came over tonight to see you, I wanted to discuss with you a subject that has been on my mind for a while. I had a whole speech memorized but the unfortunate series of events tonight and the enlightening actions we just partook in made that speech void. I wanted to say I have the highest regard for you, Penny. I would go even as far as to say I'm in love with you and have been for quite some time. I have wanted to shift the parameters of our relationship for a while. I have thought about it extensively and I wanted to ask if you would be my girlfriend.' He licked his lips nervously and waited for her reply.

Penny couldn't believe what was happening. Was her birthday wish really coming true? Sheldon had just asked her to be his girlfriend. Penny had to know what being his girlfriend would entail; she definitely couldn't handle what Amy had endured. She needed a physical relationship.

Penny made her worries known.

'I am not opposed to that, Penny,' he said with a nod of his head. 'I have been attracted to you for a long time. I just ask that you be patient with me and we move slowly.'

Penny nodded and moved closer, 'I would love to be your girlfriend, Sheldon Cooper.'

He let out a sigh of relief and smiled at her. Not his fake smile or his koala smile but a genuine and happy smile. Penny decided she loved that smile.

She gave him a soft kiss and moved in for a hug. He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her in closer.

'I thought you hated to snuggle,' Penny murmured into his neck.

'I hated to snuggle with Amy, but I find I enjoy snuggling with you.'

'Will you stay the night?' Penny asked, and felt him stiffen, 'You know, just to snuggle?'

He hesitated and Penny smiled against his neck. 'It is my birthday, you know,' she cajoled him.

Sheldon sighed, 'Very well.'

Penny grinned and pulled away, taking his hands and pulling him into her bedroom.

.

As they lay there, both still awake, Sheldon thought how enjoyable this was; having Penny in his arms at last. She shifted around a bit and tightened her arms around him.

'Sing Soft Kitty,' she murmured sleepily.

'Soft Kitty is for when you're sick, you're not sick.'

'Love is a kinda sick—it's being light-headed and having funny feelings in your belly.'

Sheldon smiled and began to sing.

End.

AN: A big thank you to StrongHermione for beta-ing this for me. This was a challenge entry for The Maple Bookshelf's July challenge.

If you follow the Harry Potter verse, I'm LadyStiff there.

Thanks for reading.


End file.
